Compilation: Raiders Of The Pop Charts
Released: 1982 – Ronco
Number of tracks: 15
Number one singles: 1* – "Do You Really Want To Hurt Me" by Culture Club
Other top ten singles: 6*
Best track: "Mickey" by Toni Basil
Hidden gem: "Best Years Of Our Lives" by Modern Romance
(*Since this is a UK compilation, the above info relates to the songs' performances on the British charts.)
Here's another compilation on vinyl bought from the excellent Waverley Antiques Bazaar, which I first heard about from someone in Bendigo last July, despite living in this part of Melbourne for nearly 16 years — and which I inexplicably only got round to visiting for the first time, today! I must say I'll be a regular customer there from now on, as it's only a ten minute drive from where I live. (And I can skive off there after work! Bargain!)
Now, I said I would only be buying Australian compilations, and this is clearly a British one, so why make the exception? Is there a song on it I just had to have? No. Three reasons really: (a) It only cost five bucks; (2) I had actually heard of it before when researching the history of compilations — I mentioned it in the very first compilation review I did on this blog; and (D) how could I pass it up with a title like that?
You can see for yourself the cover art with 'Indiana Jones', or 'Illinois Evans' if you will, on the cover there. Also notice the 'Part 1', indicating there is a second record paired with this release. The same stall I got it from also had Part 2, but I passed it up, not recognizing a single song on it.
I'm fully aware that since these songs charted primarily in the UK, I won't have heard of most of them — but really, I was living in the UK when this was released. I was only four at the time. Even so I have not heard of most of these acts in the intervening 38 years. I mean, Haircut 100? Raw Silk? Tight Fit? Incantation? Fat Larry's Band??? Never 'eard of 'em, guv'!
Anyway, the songs! It starts with "Our House" by Madness which here in Australia is currently known as the re-worded jingle for a nationwide chain of pharmacies. I'm guessing they chose it primarily because it has the word 'house' in the title, much like said pharmacies. Other songs they rejected or couldn't get the rights to: "I'll House You", "Doctorin' The House", "House Of Love" and even Madness' own "House Of Fun". Note to advertising agencies: write your own jingles, stop being creatively braindead, and keep your grubby hands off the songs of my youth, you bastards!
I'd never heard of Modern Romance — pretty dumb band name if'n ya ask me — but "Best Years Of Our Lives" is a fun, reggae-tinged song. It still sounds good — you'd think I would have heard it at least once on the radio or seen the video through all my years of watching Rage, but no, 'twas not to be. I had to wait until the Year of Our Lord Twenty Twenty-one to hear it for the first time. It's good, slightly cheesy fun! And that's what '80s music should be, peeps.
Haircut 100. Another dodgy name. The UK has come up with some of the best band names I've ever heard, XTC and Ultravox among them, but I cannot count this as one. What does that even mean? "Love Plus One" is a good'un, mind. S'a grower not a shower. Snigger snigger.
"Theme From Harry's Game" is a song I had definitely heard before somewhere — which precludes it from being my 'hidden gem' on here — but I've racked me brains (took about five seconds) and I cannot remember where I heard it. Not on the radio, not on a music video show, and definitely not from watching the TV show whence it came — what, ya think I was watchin' gritty British urban dramas when I wasn't even able to tie my shoelaces? (And I've barely mastered it now!)
It's a great song though, reaching number 5 on the UK charts — a haunting, perfectly-harmonized a capella vocal which I assumed meant something incredibly weighty when translated from Irish. I thought maybe the chorus was in English: "Long long ago, far away" — that's my 'mondegreen' of it. Not even close. As it 'appens, guv'nor, the actual lyrics are "Fol lol the doh/fol the day". WHAT???
There's some weird stuff on here. A novelty Scottish cover of the '50s song "Rawhide" which didn't chart (not exactly raiding the pop charts there, eh?), followed by a panpipe instrumental called "Cacharpaya" which sounds like a South American folk song. At first I'd say this is absurd filler, but at least it puts some cultural variation into what's on offer here. 15 tracks of synth-pop and drum machines would be pretty boring, yeah?
The Pretenders' "Back On The Chain Gang" has that reggae bass previously exhibited by Modern Romance, then Japan (see what I mean about the band names?) follow with a melancholy piano waltz. A bit more genre diversity for you there. Oh and I recognize the female vocal on Raw Silk's "Do It To The Music" — a single line of it was sampled for the mega-ace Megabass album in 1990.
Toni Basil finishes off this album with the all-conquering "Mickey", which just missed out on the number 1 spot in the UK, kept off the top by Tight Fit (though not the song by them that's on here). "Mickey", despite it being a cover, IS the '80s. This track should have come first, but maybe they saved the best for last.
Rating: 6/10
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