A Top Secret envelope arrived in my mailbox today, from my friend Dave Piper who promised a mysterious surprise. Upon opening it up, I found this. Hey, I like secrets! Let's go!
Cleverly secreted inside was this mysterious object. But by golly, what was it?
Hmmm. You know, I've seen this somewhere before, I thought to myself. I guess Dave already knew this, because before I knew it he sent me a drawing of the Soap Tablet of Euphoria!
But upon further examination, it was not the fabled soap tablet of Arthurian legend (you can read about it in Historia Saponicus, manuscript CCXVI). If Dave did actually discover this relic, I would have returned it to him, such is its value. And he certainly wouldn't have entrusted it to Australia Post of all people. No, the mystery object had to be something else.
Well then, I wondered, what about the Whetstone of Elation, which is mentioned more than once in the works of Alexandre Dumas?
Again, nice try, me, but wrong again. It was the wrong weight and texture to be the fabled whetstone of Dumasian legend. What it was, as it turned out, was something more of use to me – and therefore more valuable. A guitar plectrum, or 'pick' for those of you who speak a more uncultured brand of English.
With its chunky feel, warm tone, and the fact I haven't clumsily dropped it inside my guitar even once, it is a must-try. Thanks, Dave. Ask your purveyor of musical paraphernalia for 'The Blade' today. TODAY, I say!!
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